Have you ever been in a situation where you get an inkling you are the “expendable friend,” you know the person someone might want to socialize with at a certain time and place, but who will later be virtually forgotten.  Yes, I have been the expendable friend on many an occasion, but I have learned to deal with it.  I have even paid for my friends when we went places, or went out of my way to make them feel better when they were down, but I learned along the way I was truly expendable by a few people.  For instance, other friends were invited to major life events, but I was not even invited.  In retrospect this might have hurt my feelings, but when I thought about it, I just figured out I was not really all that important to this so-called friend.  No wonder I've become more of an introvert!

For years I have always been the person that went out of my way to help others.  I do not want to stop being who I am just because a few people have found me to be expendable.  Actually, I have received glowing compliments from strangers.  One man told me I was more helpful than most people, and I had to wonder about what he meant by that. When I thought about it, I realized I actually go out of my way to help others and to be friendly, and some people cannot be bothered.

I am not trying to criticize anyone, but we do live in a modern culture that places a high premium on self-indulgence and self-involvement.  In the past I used to listen to people who only talked or thought about themselves, but as of late I just cannot be bothered.  I might be glad so and so is ecstatic about this or that, but after awhile, it gets boring to hear someone prattle on about himself constantly. 

No one person is that exciting, and if a few people consider me the “expendable friend,”  I always bounce back and move on.  I realize I do not have the dazzling personality that is winning over crowds, so I prefer to have a few friends in my life who count and care.